Thursday, January 21, 2010

word'i-ness (n.): using 676 words when 55 will do

One of my creative writing profs back in the day introduced me to this book called, The World’s Shortest Stories. Steve Moss, the compiler of these stories has (or had) a contest each year to see who could submit the best stories in 55 words or less. Here’s an excerpt from Moss’s introduction:

“How short can a story be and still be considered a story? Charles Shultz had an answer to that question several years ago in his ‘Peanuts’ comic strip. Crabby old Lucy was once asked by Linus to please, please, please tell him a story. Lucy grudgingly obliged. Said she: ‘A man was born. He lived and died. The end.’

That’s the shortest story I’ve ever read. But, like Linus, I was left somewhat dissatisfied.

So maybe the question should be asked differently: How short can a story be and still be considered a good story? What’s the briefest possible narrative that still allows for a satisfying read?”

Without a doubt, there is a difference between a story and a plot and most of the time we (or at least, I) expect both out of anything I am going to take the time to read for pleasure. E.M. Forster uses this example to define the difference between story and plot: “’The king died, and then the queen died,’ is a story. ‘The king died and then the queen died of grief,’ is a plot.” For him, the difference is causality. While both sentences have a time sequence, it is the plot that introduces an explanation. He writes, “Consider the death of the queen. If it is in a story we say, ‘and then?’ If it is in a plot we ask, ‘why?’”

I would like to add to Forster’s plot distinction. Being of the old-school lit critic class, I find theme drastically important not only to my life, but also to the literature that I enjoy. I think James Thomas would agree. Moss quotes Thomas in his intro: “Like all fiction that matters, their success depends not on their length, but on their depth, their clarity of vision, their human significance – the extent to which the reader can recognize in them the real stuff of life.” Needless to say, if writing a story in 55 words or less is doable, writing a story with a plot in 55 words or less is something more of a hassle.

You may be wondering at this point why I am writing what appears to be a rather shoddy sort of Literature 101 essay. In fact, you may have traversed so far into the realm of boredom that you have passed that wonderment entirely and are now simply wondering why you are still reading. I can only really answer the former of your wonderments. For one thing, I admit that I truly miss my days of writing shoddy lit essays. But the real reason is because of how the 55 word story relates to a quote by Josh Billings that I read a katrillion years ago. I was pretty young when I first started writing stories and I didn’t understand most things (some things never change) but even then this quote spoke to me because I had (and still have) an enormous problem with wordiness. Billings says, “The great art of writing is knowing when to stop.”

Writing short stories has become a way for me to practice "knowing when to stop." The 55 word short story takes this practice to a whole new level. Up until now, the shortest story I have succeeded in writing, and still loving, was 118 words over the limit. So after significantly more than 55 minutes of writing and many many more than 55 words erased, I have come up with two elementary attempts at the 55 word story, plots included (or at least attempted). They came out very differently from one another and with varying flaws. Here they are. I encourage you to try some yourself. They are surprisingly intriguing and surprisingly frustrating - part work of art and part logic problem.


First attempt (52 words)

Determined to Start Over

When Calvin turned ninety six, he decided his life had been miserably unsuccessful and determined to start over.

The doctors said they could do nothing.

Philosophers promised him it was impossible.

In desperation, Calvin prayed.

Came a voice: “You’ve started over thirty five thousand, sixteen times. How many more do you need?”


Second attempt (55 words):

Words Like Brushstrokes

Twenty years, words like lashes fell so forcefully upon her she supposed they were who she was.

Until she read somewhere, “All the world’s a stage,” – Words like brushstrokes on a painted scene – And she made her exit.

Looking back, she views the painting from afar, espying a raven perched above it. Quethes he, “nevermore.”


-R.E.A.

Monday, January 4, 2010

My New Year’s resolution is to be more like my mom

I have said elsewhere on this blog that I don’t make New Year’s resolutions but this year that turns out not to be true. My New Year’s resolution is to be more like my mom. This may sound strange. I have heard that as girls get older they spend much of their time trying to avoid becoming their mothers, usually to no avail. I, however, have wanted to be like my mom since I was very little and the feeling only grows each year.

My mom is the least judgmental person I know. The only time she bashes people is if they have hurt someone she loves and even then she listens more than she bashes. The exceptions to this are, of course: anyone playing against the Steelers, and people with extremely unintelligent political views. (But after all, there is only so much one person can take quietly, particularly if she is a Kaufman and football or politics are on the line.)

Mom’s faith in things from God to earthworms inspires me all the time. She says “All shall be well” and she believes it. She also believes in grace. When she believes in something, she believes in it all the way through. I don’t know if she has her own doubts. I’d be surprised if she didn’t. But something Mom’s taught me is that having doubts is not the same thing as lacking faith. Here are some of the things Mom has taught me to have faith in:

  • God
  • rain, compost, and the wisdom of nature
  • good books
  • things built to last
  • people
  • conscience
  • roots
  • wings

Don’t even get me started on the kind of mother Mom is. Mom sang me “Would You Like to Swing on a Star,” and “Que Sera Sera,” and “Joanie,” and read me “Where the Sidewalk Ends,” and “The Runaway Bunny,” and “The Chronicles of Narnia.” I can still remember sitting in her lap with my big stack of books and her arms wrapped around me. Or laying under blankets by the fireplace before bed and listening to her read - some of the most comforting memories of my life. Mom nurtured in me a love for reading, writing, country music, mountains, and a hundred million other things. And when I am stupid and boring and wrong, she tells me that she knows I’ll make the right decision and that everything will be okay. She’s not faking. She really believes in me and in the world. Mom has always wanted to hear what I have to say, or at least pretended to. And trust me, once I get started, I don’t stop easily. Never once in my entire life has Mom not had time for me.

Mom doesn’t care when you cry or how you cry or why you cry or whether you’re being a big fat ridiculous baby. She always gets that soft sympathetic look in her eyes and holds you close. Even if you’re not her kid she’ll do that. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to hold a candle to her as a mother, but I know my kids will be okay because they’ll have Mom as a grandmother.

I bounce ideas off Mom almost before I bounce them off my own brain. That’s because Mom is one of the smartest people I know. I know I’m probably biased, but I think Mom may be one of the smartest people in the world. Mom knows things: useful and otherwise. There’s no enjoying Jeopardy when she’s in the room; you only wind up feeling badly about yourself. Alex Trebek gets to read the cards, but Mom knows the answers. Mom’s also a talented thinker. She doesn’t mind people questioning her beliefs. She’s thought them through and she can defend them. And she knows there’re some things she doesn’t know. She’s willing to think about those things too. Mom knows history and current events and how to pronounce words and scientific concepts and how to grow a hundred different plants and what they’re named (common and scientific). There’s a difference between intelligence and wisdom and Mom’s got both.

More than anyone else I know, Mom knows how to put things into perspective. I was on the phone with her the other day concerned because I was calling to tell her how I had spoiled a plan she had made. Mom just laughed. She never tells people they should have done what they should have done. She lets the silly stupid things that happen pass without making people feel badly about themselves. Mom can make a meal for four turn into a meal for ten in the time it takes for the front door to open and close six more times. And when you’re not there when you said you were going to be, she doesn’t grudge you the leftovers. Mom knows how important it is to feed the soul.

I’ve heard that it’s impossible to fathom the depth of the love you will have for your children before you have them. I’m sure this is true. But I know from experience that it is impossible to fathom the amount of love you can have for your parents even when you are in the midst of that love. I could say that to have parents and a sister such as mine nearly sets me up for failure – so much do I have to live up to and so great is the pressure. But it’s not true. To have parents and a sister such as mine is to have all the tools and guidance needed to make a life worth living.

(Disclaimer) I have tried, in saying what I have been trying to say, to avoid clichés fit for Mother’s Day greeting cards, none of which do Mom the credit she deserves. I know that I have, for the most part, not given the other influential people in my life their due in this entry. This one’s for Mom. She deserves that. And truthfully, I have not halfway gotten to the wonderfulness that is Mom. If you know her, I’m sure you’ll agree. But if 2010 gets me one step closer to possessing the grace and strength of my mother, it will truly be a successful year.


Taylor Swift's "The Best Day": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4_6eQm7RTQ


-R.E.A.